Welcome to the Space that always is…

Special Alert Blog…

I have a friend who has been wracked with visions from a past life (I think they are relieved after seeing 2 Hawaiian healers). For decades he has believed he was a Nazi dentist in a past life. I’m putting my money on the LSD therapy he tried in 1976 to resolve this Holocaust memories. You know the one, where he attempted to strangle his therapist mid-session.

“That went well.”

He’s nearly 70 now and we met at a spiritual gathering in 2009. The lead teacher, it seemed, was helping many people with past life issues and Jesus problems. This is not why I went. Does anyone know why I went?! Anyway, the misfit Christian’s flocked to this teacher like Santa’s toys trying to get into the Elf workshop.

Most of the Christians who come to these spiritually-centered events no longer believe in the mainline religious doctrine and dogma. They still love Jesus the Christ just fine.

Only these various christian sects: evangelists, catholics and others have left out the mystical aspect of their faith tradition-that is: living the awakened life just as Jesus did.

This has left the congregational castaways distraught and confused. They come to spiritual teachers (with no religious affiliation) so they can taste the direct experience of divinity within themselves. They are no longer able to deal with original sin, guilt and the ‘have to’s’ and ‘shoulds’ that one day will lead to heaven.

I am speaking primarily of the mainstream religious, fundamentalist, conservative-based churches. For the church hierarchy seems to simultaneously canonize their Saints (most of them mystics) while at the same time denying and condemning the mystical. Instead the Church creates the Easter Bunny myth – which in some bizarre way promotes membership before the resurrection. It’s all quite astonishing.

The liberal christian churches are more open and slowly beginning to bring small particles of mysticism back. One day we might even here the mystics being quoted:

“My Beloved is the mountains – And lonely wooded valleys – strange islands – And resounding rivers – The whistling of love-stirring breezes – The tranquil night at the time of the rising dawn – Silent Music – Sounding solitude – The Supper that refreshes and deepens love.

-Saint John of the Cross

Or, Meister Eckhart, pure mystic and a Dominican Priest:

“The most important hour is always the present. The most significant person is always the one sitting across from you right now. The most necessary work is always: LOVE…for the person that has learned to let go and let be, nothing can ever get in the way again.”

In the non-dual spiritual circles, the mystical is alive and shining but the communal heart is missing in most of them. Instead of instantly helping one of their satsang-congregation, they will often dismiss them with statements like “It’s just part of the path; or “good luck with that”, with no help forthcoming unless their beloved teacher is sick, when the entire satsang congregation jumps to earn special merit and enlightenment-brownie points.

The religious castaways want to experience heaven directly now, while living, to see the truth in the two most essential Biblical scriptures of all: ‘The Kingdom of God is Within’ and ‘Be still and know that I am God’. They are unable to do this within the strict religious orthodoxy – without leaving.

And in one area the Christian Churches, most all of them, far excel over non-dualistic spirituality; that of community. The church members help each other in crisis and true need, no matter the cause, why or how.

And in leaving the church one must let go of this great benefit of orthodox religion–that of community. This loss of community is felt deeply and the cause of much pain. For many of those leaving mainstream religion have been blown open by a mystical experience, life intensity or soul-altering encounter and they come to these spiritual teachers to help find an anchoring-point in the vastness of Consciousness- the unknown, mystical land.

Like my friend, these seekers came by the dozens to this spiritualist to recover their faith. And the spiritual advisors of today must be part priest, witch doctor, exorcist, past life regressionist and shrink – to deal with modern man’s vast array of delusional impulses, emotional deep-freeze and psychotic episodes. This is why, with the loads of: money, fame and spiritual hero worship at stake, a new profession is exploding: Spiritual Teacher (with no religious affiliation). One must be deeply earnest to find a true teacher here; authentic spiritual teachers are out there but many imposter, half-baked, spiritual guru-wannabe’s are as well.

The Nazi dentist, past life thing truly was ‘real’ to my friend, torturing at times based on our conversations. Besides the inner demons (thoughts)-which made up his whole phenomena, my friend’s outer waking life showed no negative correlative karma—in the dental arena at least.

I’m starting to wonder, however, if I wasn’t his dental assistant back then. Though not rocked by torturous thoughts and visions of unnecessary dental procedures and experiments inflicted on people, the actual fact is: this mouth has been pounded, beaten and yanked upon, and bled. UNCLE! Time to call the oral surgeon. He’ll fit me in and add some torque to an already, as he said – “difficult extraction process” and “you may have to ride this out for a couple of weeks.”

Thanks doc.

Number 3, you might have forgotten or never gave him a second thought, but he did not go quietly. Drilled into 3 pieces to match his 3 roots, chiseled, hammered, drilled again and again. Did I mention tugged? At one point the oral surgeon, a sweetheart of a guy by the way, I’m sure was going to put his feet on my chest for more leverage. Even with all the modern equipment, extracting an FN tooth is still a battle. When Number 3 finally left, not so much as a whimper was heard.

But did Tooth Number 3 leave any depth charges in his wake? You know, babies: necrotic bone potholes, bits of residual periodontal ligament or other pissed off brethren. Next time it’s definitely half a fifth of JD and a pair of pliers-I’ll pull it myself.

So instead of a quick recovery, I am into what is called: Dry Socket. They say it happens somewhat rarely, normally with wisdom teeth extractions, and takes place when an improper blood clot forms exposing the bone underneath. Holy shit batman! Misty Migraine marries Stanley Steroid. This was further exacerbated by an allergic-type reaction to the anesthesia mixture ( Most dentists and oral surgeons no longer use novocaine, and haven’t in over 30 years, instead using septocaine hydrochloride and epinephrine and perhaps other added agents. So many updates come down the pike and most dentists just accept them as an improvement) Allergic reactions include:

  • tongue pain or swelling,
  • facial swelling,
  • headache,
  • mouth sores,
  • nausea,
  • vomiting,
  • constipation,
  • diarrhea,
  • upset stomach,
  • increased thirst,
  • drooling,
  • nervousness,
  • dizziness,
  • drowsiness,
  • ear pain/earache,
  • neck pain,
  • joint or muscle pain,
  • unusual or unpleasant taste in your mouth,
  • numbness or tingly feeling,
  • mild skin rash or itching,
  • runny nose, or
  • sore throat.

Dry Socket is a Native American name for the pet feral cat you never see and never want to see again. Dry Socket, my feline friend laughed at Advil; thought Tylenol was catnip. Time for some upper level help from the Grandfathers on this one: that be the Opiate Clan and Mr. Vicodeine. Find the bloodstream pronto! I’m definitely astral-projecting to the dead Shaman (they never die) – the one I badmouthed 20 years ago for trying to sleep with my partner.

“Take the arrows out of Mikey Doll’s face, jaw, neck and head–Oh pretty please. And if that doesn’t work, I’ll add. “You can sleep with her now.”

One moment at a time. No mind story, just sensation. No labels: ‘pain’, ‘nausea’ – just breath. Otherwise a dramatic mess starts with “I” am in pain. “I” this and that. But if there’s no “I” thought story, then what?!

“But I could vomit any minute.” “I” again. Who or what is “I”? Tracing it back with inquiry, no “I” is found. No “I” was ever there. Migraine, nausea are only associative labels added on to continue the false narrative. Tracing back, tracing back to the source of “I”- “I” is gone, never there, ending in SOURCE, what always is our true nature.


*Disclaimer: The following blog was written while the author was under the influence of Dry Socket and edited/translated while high on Vicodeine (blissful apathy) and therefore he cannot be held accountable for content:)

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